Episode 046: To Marry or Not to Marry

By Help Person|December 19, 2017|Show notes, Uncategorized|

Episode 046: To Marry or Not To Marry with special guest Ross Belsky

Please accept our apologies! This episode sounds ‘tinny’ this week (tinny not tiny). Leanne is in Vegas and she and The Boyfriend had to improvise.

Leanne and The Boyfriend talk about on-again/off-again relationships and why they got back together and what worked and what didn’t. They have each had an on-again/off-again relationship and new it wouldn’t really work, but did it anyway.

Meet this week’s guest, New York comedian, Ross Belsky! Ross has never been married, but is an on-again/off-again relationship and is considering marriage. However, he’s really scared about the possibilities of divorce.

Born and raised in Queens. His parents are still married and Ross is scared of divorce. He has a friend who got divorced and it was a financial and social nightmare. Ross is seriously thinking of married his long-term girlfriend, but he’s not sure he’s ready. His friend is five years older and Ross really doesn’t offer him advice since he’s younger and has never been married. Ross just got his girlfriend a promise ring. He didn’t want to make a move they might not be ready for. His brother bought the ring. Ross worries that he’s not financially prepared.

Life_Lafter_Divorce_Quote_ep46a_fear_of_divorceHis biggest fear of divorce is about not staying together. He met his girlfriend in high school and  they started dating when they were 18. When they turned 22, they broke up only to get back together three years later. They are now 27.

Ross pictures marriage as a romantic white picket fence kind of thing, but he knows it should be more natural and realistic than that. The idea of kids is scary to him. Just living or being married to someone would be easy, but kids would definitely complicate things – especially if a break up is involved.

Ross’s parents have had a successful marriage.

What part of marriage works? All of it? None of it? Ross knows he loves his girlfriend and her family. He knows he doesn’t want to be without her. They were each other’s first love.

Life_Lafter_Divorce_Quote_ep46c_fear_of_divorceArguments come up here and there. Ross prefers to let the storm pass and then talks about it later. He keeps his anger in so he doesn’t say anything stupid.

When he and his girlfriend took their three year break, Ross went to a different school. For a while they would trade visits, and eventually they were both got accepted to a better college. This is when they took their relationship to the next level and they kinda lived together. He spent a lot of time in her dorm, but he was pledging a fraternity. Then she cheated on him. They broke up and Ross was really depressed after that.

Life_Lafter_Divorce_Quote_ep46b_fear_of_divorceNow he just thinks of how sad it was without her and makes more of an effort with her. He’s more focused on her now rather than just hanging out with the guys.

He feels more comfortable with his girlfriend because she knows everything about him already, including his depression.

Ross realizes he has a few issues to address before he can make a decision. He wants someone who wants the same thing as him – the same hopes and dreams of a family. So what’s holding him back? Does he know?

Tweetables:

Tweet: How do we know if they’re ‘the one’? ep46 #wonder #marriage #decisions #committment #divorce #lifelafterdivorce #podcast

Tweet:  Does anyone really get married hoping to divorce? Ep46 #howdoyouknow #engagement #popthequestion #motivationalmonday #success #divorce #podcast #fail

Tweet:  What DID your ideal marriage look like? #Marriage #divorce #podcast #relationships #lifelafterdivorce #podcast #thebigday #wedding #marriedlife

Tweet: #Depression and #Divorce – is there a link? #wonder #change #relationship #marriage #selfcare #love #followme

Tweet: Do you stick it out? When do you know when to call it quits? #relationships #divorce #marriage #podcast #liveyourbestlife #gratitude #love

 

Links

www.lifelafterdivorce.com
www.twitter.com/lafterdivorce
https://www.facebook.com/LifeLafterDivorce/
https://www.instagram.com/lifelafterdivorce/

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